05 April 2015
04 April 2015
Some app or other required me to have a Facebook account, so I set up an innocuous "dummy" account. Facebook could not leave well enough alone--working hard to glean information from my other web activities. They always got it all wrong.
Often I would view my older sister's Facebook account to see family updates. I quit that. I found even navigating Facebook pages with an iPhone or iPad cumbersome and time wasting. And, there was just too much junk to wade through to get to anything even tangentially relevant. If my family wants me to have photos and updates, they can call or email me.
I know what's going on in the lives of my friends and any close family members, because they keep in touch with me. And, I pray for them.
I regularly chat by phone and FaceTime with those who care about me and my husband, kids, and grandkids. I'm an emotionally generous person and I make sure to keep reciprocal, loving relationships current.
This Auto-immune drama of the past 8 months is exhausting and complex. Even good, competent doctors have differing opinions. I've found that the insincere people in my life don't acknowledge the debilitating and exhausting symptoms I'm enduring. They don't bother to keep in touch or offer encouragement and support; check on my well-being. Life is too short to chase down fair-weather friends and family members.
I'm doing well, emotionally and physically--after 3 months of a very bad flare, highly exacerbated by over 3 months of a prescription that caused accute insomnia. I still have a ways to go, but sifting through the pain and inconveniences of this disorder with doctors and my loved ones has been both productive and enlightening. Being proactive here has migrated into other important areas of my life.
I'm done talking behind peoples' backs. A life-time, family-of-origin communication style. I forsake that sin, and with God's help I will speak direct truth to those I love.
I'm done with people who have sinned against me and cannot find the conviction to confess, repair our relationship, and move forward in God's grace. If you cannot ask for forgiveness--not only from God, but from those you've sinned against--you're only limiting how God's grace will expand in your own life. If I've sinned against you and you tell everyone except me about it, how can I seek your forgiveness? How will I recognize my sin?
I'm done giving advice and time, and emotions to those who choose to wallow in life's hurts and dramas. (Lately, I've been reading about "secondary benefits." Allowing the rehashing of one's past pain to attract sympathy and attention in the present.) No one can control anyone other than themselves, and any one person's influence on another is minimal. Everyone has a story. It's what you do after that counts.
I will continue to give help and support, and pray for those in need. I can very effectively do that without the continual re-hashing of the details, dramas, pain, and history behind the prayer request. I no longer have the stamina required to enter into someone else's turmoil. And, God isn't asking me to.
Beware of anyone claiming to have "discernment." That's like having to tell everyone that you're pretty or smart. If you have "the gift of discernment" it'll be easily apparent to all.
So, if you haven't heard from me lately it might be that you owe me a call. Maybe you owe me an apology.
And, if you are in the midst of pain and/or drama you can be assured I'm praying for you. I don't need all the details bogging down my spirit; I still pray.
God is in control. I'm working hard to not impede his actions or process. He's sufficient. After all those years of me thinking he needed my wisdom, words, emotions, intervention. He's sufficient.